Greetings from Nurturing Your Success! Here’s your dose of Mental Fitness.

One of the traps of the mind that people (me included!) fall victim to is devaluing your work. In The Journey Called YOU, this obstacle is called, “Discounting Your Knowledge.” What this means is that once you learn something and you become good at it, you then diminish its value IN YOUR MIND. Your thoughts may sound something like this, “It’s no big deal.” “If it’s easy for you, it’s easy for everyone.” “Everyone knows that.” And perhaps even, “What’s next?” Sound familiar?

You use the new learning in your work and it becomes you, so it’s easy to forget what it actually took to learn this new thing and how you may have evolved along the way and how it now impacts your work or how you present yourself to others.

When you succumb to these thoughts, you dismiss wonderful things about you, things you have learned to do well, and things that perhaps others would pay you handsomely for! By devaluing the very things that you are and have become, you create dissonance between your successes and your valuation of those successes. This has certain negative or unwanted consequences. For one thing, you don’t feel good about your work; you are not satisfied. There is a longing to do better and better, a sense of never quite being good enough because you don’t stop to give yourself any credit for how you’ve grown and changed and the impact that the growth has had on you, your work, and your relationships.

Secondly, while others may see the difference in you, because YOU have trouble seeing it, you might have difficulty accepting when others mention it. For instance, a colleague recognizes your work through a public acknowledgement. Instantly, you feel uncomfortable. “It’s no big deal. She shouldn’t have said anything,” you think to yourself. And depending upon your self-esteem, you might take it even further by refuting this compliment, “Oh it was nothing,” which is not only further damaging to your self-esteem, it can be insulting to the person who gave the compliment.

Coaching tip: So how do you go about overcoming this trick of the mind? Be open to the value that your learning has on you and on your ability to produce. The more you learn, the greater your output. That’s fact. Don’t dismiss it because it is YOU doing the learning. Celebrate it – CELEBRATE YOU! You are wonderful. And second, when someone acknowledges you in some way, pay attention. Say, “thank you!” and consider what this feedback means to you. They offer you a wonderful gift by sharing with you what they observe has changed in you. It has value to THEM – even if you don’t see it. You might want to ask them a question about what that value is so that you can continue to do more of it.

Til next time – choose good thoughts.

Your coach and partner for success,

Julie